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soft hands.

8.31.2005
The New York Yankees and the NFL are each donating $1 million to the American Red Cross to assist victims of Hurricane Katrina in Louisiana, Mississippi and Alabama.

Yankees owner George Steinbrenner said the franchise was “heeding the President’s call to help the people devastated by this hurricane in the affected areas.

“This is one of America’s greatest natural disasters and tragedies and it is the responsibility of the American public to step up and help those in need.” [msnbc]


that's redcross.org, in case you missed it. cough.

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7:55 PM :: 0 comments ::

lupe! :: permalink


quote of the now

"he's a little like a young billy idol.. in a 6'8" kinda way." -- david justice, on richie joy of sexson's new platinum 'do

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12:06 AM :: 0 comments ::

lupe! :: permalink


go together like a horse and carriage

8.30.2005
Police have responded three times to the suburban home of Los Angeles Dodgers outfielder Milton Bradley on domestic violence calls, but neither he nor his pregnant wife were arrested or charged.

Redondo Beach police counseled the couple after responding on June 28 and July 30. In the June report, Bradley told police his wife had hit and scratched him because she suspected him of cheating on her.

The police reports were obtained by the Daily Breeze of Torrance, which reported them Tuesday. [sf chronicle]
9:52 PM :: 1 comments ::

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quote of the day

"We pitched well for four innings. The sad thing is you have to pitch well for nine innings.'' - Mike Hargrove

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7:02 AM :: 1 comments ::

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8.29.2005
saw this series of photos well before they started to make their way around the interweb and was initially tempted to post the link here, but (even though they're nowhere near earthshatteringly racy, or anything) for whatever reason thought better of it. now that they're out there, what the hell: moose acting like a normal baseball player, go figure.

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7:11 PM :: 3 comments ::

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vomit everywhere

that terrible sound you hear is amy and i rending our garments and tearing our hair. for completely different reasons, of course. per fox sports: "Mark Bellhorn, one of the heroes of the Red Sox's 2004 postseason run, will join the rival Yankees once he clears waivers at 1 p.m. Tuesday, FOXSports.com has learned."

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6:56 PM :: 2 comments ::

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quote of the day

"Because we beat him to a pulp today and because Imperial Vixens have needs...you get a pass. This time." -- Darth Marc, in response to KB's Greinke infatuation

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6:08 PM :: 0 comments ::

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it's a tearjerker

8.28.2005
The Sad Plight of Felix Rodriguez
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why, david dejesus?

8.26.2005
why?

ddejesuscosmowtf
11:09 PM :: 2 comments ::

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good to know

mo wasted 22 pitches tonight, and stl is now 16-5 on fridays.
9:58 PM :: 0 comments ::

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8.25.2005
because i know you're all dying to know what lupe/chacon spawn will look like:



artistic rendition by kimmeh
9:12 PM :: 0 comments ::

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8.24.2005
dear eric hinske

if you ever want to know what actual pain in your hand feels like, i'd be happy to smash your fingers with the claw side of a rusty hammer. let me know!

love
lupe
8:47 PM :: 5 comments ::

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my baby daddy du jour

8.23.2005
(though jaret wright might be giving him a run for his money)

Against high odds and all logic, Chacon, loser in 20 of his last 22 decisions in Colorado, exceeds every expectation, while Johnson, the soon-to-be 42-year-old Unit, fails to meet any. In the heat of a postseason survival race, Chacon pitches to an earned run average of 1.64, while Johnson weighs in at 4.34.

"I went through some tough times as the closer last year in Colorado, booed off the field some games, and that's at home, where I grew up, in front of family and friends," Chacon said. "I came over here, with a chance to be in a playoff race, something I've never been a part of, and I'm thinking, what have I got to lose?"

..."I was all power fastball, power curve," he said. Trying to make a living at Coors Field in Denver for a bad Rockies team didn't help much, but, he said, pitching in Yankee Stadium, with so much offense on his side, "I've realized I don't have to throw hard all the time."

"I need to throw my breaking ball for strikes, keep my team in the game," he said. "I'm not here to save the world." [ny times]

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8.21.2005
HR - T Iguchi (12, 4th inning off Ra Johnson 0 on, 1 Out), A Rowand (11, 4th inning off Ra Johnson 0 on, 1 Out), P Konerko (32, 4th inning off Ra Johnson 0 on, 1 Out), C Widger (4, 4th inning off Ra Johnson 2 on, 1 Out).


four home runs? chris fucking widger?!

ALL THE BAD WORDS I CAN THINK OF
5:13 PM :: 1 comments ::

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congratulations matty mo!

on your 100th win, even though you've got that unfortunate growth on your face.

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2:41 AM :: 4 comments ::

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dear chone shawn chacon

8.20.2005
hows about you and me make some little crooked-hat gangsta babies? oh yes.

sincerely,
lupe
4:45 PM :: 0 comments ::

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like it hasn't crossed your mind

8.18.2005
from another blog, who fully admits it's all rumor at this point.... but entirely too juicy to pass by:

Most of you have probably heard about 2 more positive steroid tests one in the AL and one in the NL. MLB will not reveal names until after the appeal process but....

Rumor has it....Roger Clemens

This has apparently been confirmed by multiple sources inside MLB who say he is in the process of appealing. Take it with a grain of salt but it wouldn't surprise me in the least if this comes out in the next few days. I believe this is the announcement of the player that will supposedly 'bring baseball to its knees' .


well, it would certainly explain the ginormous head.
10:05 PM :: 3 comments ::

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quote of the day

brought to you by june:

"in the major leagues, you need a centerfielder." - joe morgan, supergenius

i guess that's why the yankees failed miserably in that regard: joe morgan, ruiner of things, failed to fax them the CFer memo.

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:|

the worst thing about this is that, craptastic though they've been, they'll probably hang in there long enough to make those last four games at fenway at worst really hurt, or at best delay the hurt.
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8.17.2005
i enjoy how the winning streak began my first day in vegas and ended when i got back to jersey. good job, guys.
6:54 PM :: 2 comments ::

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SEE YA!

8.10.2005
sorry, i had to. i'm off to vegas to drown my baseball sorrows in coke and whores. back in a week.
5:47 AM :: 3 comments ::

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separated at birth?

8.09.2005





credit goes to juney for this one

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8.08.2005
hey, they improved to 2-32 when scoring three runs or fewer! congratulations!
11:22 PM :: 1 comments ::

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well i've been working really hard with donnie and

8.07.2005
.389/.593/1.111 over the last week? gosh.
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i forgot the best one of all

kay: what is that stat there, kenny? the one... see schoenweis... whip... w-h-i-p?
singleton: With Hitters In... [long pause] i dunno!

***

interpreted in the style of the screwing the blouse man post:

: what is that stat there, kenny? the one... see schoenweis... whip... w-h-i-p?

: With Hitters In... [long pause] i dunno! [dr hibbert chuckle]

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8:03 PM :: 5 comments ::

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is it wrong that

i was disappointed to come home and find that the yankees won? i was rather hoping al leiter would be pitching himself out of a starting job.

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5:31 PM :: 2 comments ::

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8.06.2005
dear randy johnson,

maybe you should stick to cleaning, since this pitching thing doesn't seem to be working out.

burning hatred,
lupe
7:34 PM :: 1 comments ::

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love it when mlb.tv doesn't go to commercials

because then you get to hear michael kay say things like

"that's an attractive girl there in the white dress!"

"the mcdonalds around the corner from the hotel? it's open 24 hours a day. OH YEAH, THEY CHANGED IT."

***

edited to add more, because the between inning banter is more enjoyable than half the games have been this year.

michael kay: i had [one flew over the cuckoo's nest] in the dvd! and.. and i, actually.. something...
dr hibbert ken singleton: and something came up, right!
kay: something DID come up!
singleton: yeah right!
kay: it's gonna happen --
singleton: you shoulda told her to go home!

***

and so, girls, i've learned that not only are we not safe from players, umpires, base coaches, and that drunk guy two rows back, but broadcasters as well:

kay: WHOAAA! there's a winner! -- there's two winners that just entered the booth! oh my god! lee, you have to stand up. lee, you MUST stand up. oh my goodness...
kay and singleton in unison: no more calls!
kay: oh ho! no visible means of upper support
singleton : and bouncin! likin' the music!
kay: oh my good--- did you see?!
singleton: let me outta here!
kay: we've lost kenny. earth to kenny...
singleton: is there a game tonight?
[long silence]
kay: god, that's...smokin......
singleton: hey, that's michael jackson, on the scoreboard.. he's at the game..
kay: [in obvious distress that the cameraman has panned elsewhere] what are you DOING, lee?

***

singleton [watching aaron small, who bears an eerie resemblance to jim kaat, in the dugout] YOUNG KITTY! on his way to 283 career victories!

***

singleton [on embree relieving small]: this guy's still pitching for the red sox.

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5:29 PM :: 2 comments ::

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8.05.2005
from bronx banter:
The batboy that the Cleveland Indians provide to visiting ballclubs at Jacobs field is a portly, Asian, Ohio State student who keeps the cleanest dugout in the major leagues. According to the YES broadcasters, the Yankees have absolutely fallen in love with this bulbous batboy who actually sweeps the visiting dugout when the team is in the field. Their fondness for the kid was on display in the bottom of the sixth inning last night when, as he swept his way past Randy Johnson, the Big Unit stood up and took over for him, sweeping sunflower seed shells and such into a neat pile, then going to grab a dust pan.


my first reaction to the kid was "HEY! HIDEKI IRABU'S BACK!"

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gary being gary!

"...ain't going to say who [the real leader of the yankees] is, but I know who it is. I know who the team feeds off. I know who the opposing team comes in knowing they have to defend to stop the Yankees." -- gary sheffield

mo! did i guess right? do i win?

and about the media portraying only jeter and arod in a positive light... i agree 654 percent with him about jeter, but he can't be reading the same articles on arod i've been reading because the new york media's done little else but piss and moan about alex rodriguez since he got here. maybe a nice piece here and there when he does something they can't ignore, but overall, utter quiet unless it's to bitch about unclutchness, true yankee-ness, or his contract.

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11:07 AM :: 2 comments ::

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for all you gossip whores

8.04.2005
the following links are NOT SAFE FOR WORK.

trinka's side, adult fyi

the cuckolded husband's side, adult fyi

thanks to the lovely lorena for all the info on the lowe debacle.
8:06 AM :: 3 comments ::

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you people and your true yankee bullshit

8.03.2005
from a jay mohr thing i'm not linking to:

"3B Alex Rodriguez [not a **** ******] -- should have been -- 3B Eric Hinske [born to be in pinstripes]."

this is supposed to be some kind of comedy, right?

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9:39 PM :: 3 comments ::

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quote of the day

comes from juney's blog, as i am taking a break from what was a maddeningly horseshit game last time i looked.

"45 minutes on your mom!" -- Steve Kline, in response to a cub fan yelling "Hey, Kline, what's your record?"

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9:15 PM :: 1 comments ::

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insert joke about the derek lowe face here

8.02.2005
Anchor-reporter Carolyn Hughes has been taken off Dodger coverage at Fox Sports West during an investigation of her relationship with pitcher Derek Lowe, the pay site Ron Fineman's On the Record reports. Neither Lowe nor Hughes would comment to Fineman, but Lowe's wife Trinka had plenty to say. She told Fineman that she tipped Fox about her husband having an affair with Hughes and staying overnight at her place in Manhattan Beach. Both Lowe and Hughes insist to her they are just friends, but Trinka says "he wanted me gone when he came back from the next road trip." The Lowes have sold their Beverly Hills home and Trinka has moved back to Florida. Fineman runs a series of uncredited (and unexplained) photographs he says show Lowe and Hughes together on Wednesday. Hughes hosts the Dodgers pregame show, "Dodgers Dugout." [la observed]

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7:32 AM :: 2 comments ::

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quotes of the day

8.01.2005
"I was hoping the Yomiuri Giants would make a phone call." - Brian Cashman on the then-potential Manny trade

"Big Head Joe Buck walks by. And I do mean BIG HEAD . I was expecting him to say "Take me to your leader. We're from France." He's about 6 foot. Four feet of it is head. Hilarious." - darth marc

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2:46 PM :: 1 comments ::

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liar liar pants on fire?



edit: yup!
11:58 AM :: 0 comments ::

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hate the angels, but love that little willie randolph looking superutility guy. love him.

11:35 AM :: 0 comments ::

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are you threatening me?

matt desalvo, on whether pitching is more math or psychology:

"It's both. Isn't math psychology? If you're at bat, you're going to adjust to what I'm throwing you. If I throw you the same pitch two times in a row, in a certain zone, what are the chances I'll throw a third? Isn't it more likely I'm going to add or subtract, or go to another spot? But what if I don't? Do I have you thinking about that?”

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