: smithers, are they booing me?
: uh, no sir, they're saying boo-URNS. boo-URNS!
[to the crowd]: excuse me, are you saying boo or boo-urns?
: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!11
: i was saying boo-urns :( Labels: less than three, national league, screwing the blouse man, things that are funny
: I lost Labels: %#^%*$, screwing the blouse man, vomit everywhere, yanquis
: Excuse me.
: What are you doing?: I need this machine so I can watch a tape for a story.: I'm using the tape. I'm showing Jeffrey my Emmy tape. We are watching history.: Mr. Burgundy, I'm a professional, and I would like to be able to do my job.: Big deal. I am very professional.: Mr. Burgundy, you are acting like a baby.: I'm not a baby, I am a man. I am an anchorman.: You are not a man. You are a big fat joke.: I'm a man who discovered the wheel and built the Eiffel Tower out of metal and brawn. That's what kind of man I am. You're just a woman with a small brain. With a brain a third the size of us. It's science.: I will have you know that I have more talent and more intelligence in my little finger than you do in your entire body, sir.: You are a smelly pirate hooker.: You look like a blueberry.: Why don't you go back to your home on Whore Island? : Well, you have bad hair.: [insulted] What did you say?: I said... your hair... looks stupid.Labels: screwing the blouse man
: Incredible! One of the worst performances of my career and they never doubted it for a second.
: Maybe I'm overreacting. Maybe Ferris isn't such a bad guy. After all, I got a car, he got a computer. But still, why should he get to do whatever he wants, whenever he wants? Why should everything work out for him? What makes him so goddamn special?: Screw him. 
: Why'd you kick me?: Where's your brain?: Why'd you kick me?: Where's your brain?: Why'd you kick me?: Where's your brain?: I asked you first.: How can we pick up Sloane if Rooney is there with her?: I said for her to be there alone and you freaked.: Now, I didn't hit you. I lightly slapped you.: You hit me. Look, don't make me participate in your stupid crap if you don't like the way I do it. You make me get out of bed, you make me come over here. You make me make a phony phone call to Edward Rooney? The man could squash my nuts into oblivion. And-and-and then, and then, you deliberately hurt my feelings. 
: I did not achieve this position in life by having some snot-nosed punk leave my cheese out in the wind. : Ladies and gentlemen, you are such a wonderful crowd, we'd like to play a little tune for you. It's one of my personal favorites and I'd like to dedicate it to a young man who doesn't think he's seen anything good today - Cameron Frye, this one's for you.: [screams]
: Ferris! Get off of the float!
: There's someone you should talk to.: If you say Ferris Bueller, you lose a testicle.: Oh, you know him? : What's your name?: It's Jean, but most guys call me Shauna.: Bye Jean.
: Oh, he's very popular, Ed. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, waistoids, dweebies, dickheads—they all adore him. They all think he's a righteous dude.Labels: screwing the blouse man
: what is that stat there, kenny? the one... see schoenweis... whip... w-h-i-p?
: With Hitters In... [long pause] i dunno! [dr hibbert chuckle]Labels: screwing the blouse man, things that are funny, yes men
