o frabjous clutchitude

Down 2-1 in the eighth inning, he saw the second pitch from Meredith, and if it wasn’t fat as an opera singer. When Pujols connected, every Cardinals player leapt from his spot on the bench, all of the fans from their seats around the stadium, John Nelson and Aaron Miles from their bases and Meredith from the pitchers’ mound. Pujols, the yin to everyone’s yang, stood there stoic, an artist admiring his work, watching the ball travel 425 feet into the third deck, seeing the Cardinals’ skid go right with it, lifting St. Louis one more time, like he’s got a clause in his contract that requires at least a dozen EKG moments a year. [jeff passan]

Labels: birds on bat

i think we can safely eliminate joe torre and kim jones

from 9/15:

I'm going to protect the names of the guilty, in part because I did not hear it myself, but was told by someone I trust impeccably. But a member of a major electronic media outlet walked into the office of one of tonight's managers and said, "Hi, Love Muffin."

Are you kidding me?

Do ya think we could at least pretend we're professional?

Anyway, now that I got THAT out of my system... [gordon edes' extra bases blog]

Labels: boys behaving badly, sox

oh yeah

i think kim jones needs to pass randy johnson a note in study hall that says

my favorite part

me: i love the shot of melky happily dumping beer on alex and jeter, and then studiously pouring on just jeter's head
juney: yeah like a little kid having to concentrate on tying his shoe

(screenshot courtesy of mike)

i won't read the article (that there carefully chosen giambi quote just ripe for misconstruing tells me alllll i need to know about the tenor of the piece. nice timing, by the way) but i have to pause for a moment to appreciate the rodriguez photo:




and oh yeah... one more, bitches:

Labels: team a-rod

well

that was some of the ugliest, most frustrating baseball i've seen in awhile. well done, boys. i was starting to miss the ulcers.

hah

very little in this world makes me smile so hard as one of juney's tirades:

First of all: according to the Random House unabridged dictionary (ipp):
val‧u‧a‧ble  [val-yoo-uh-buhl]: of considerable use, service, or importance

OK, then: Courtesy of the lovely and talented tht: selected folks, in descending order (italics mine because I am not feeling well and am in an extra bitchy mood).......

just wanted to point youall in the direction of a nice ny times piece on our own kitty kaat, who's gonna RV into the sunset after tomorrow night's broadcast. now if you'll excuse me, i'm going to pretend it's not happening.

bernie quote buried in a daily news article about the capn's hit streak:

At that point, [mazzilli and torre] thought Jeter's streak was over. Bernie Williams only made matters worse when he thanked Torre for taking Jeter out since Jeter's streak is the longest by a Yankee since Williams hit in 21 straight games in 1993.

"(Bernie) said, 'This way he can't pass me and now everyone's going to know I'm your favorite player,'" Torre said.

naw bern, we're already painfully aware of that.

quote of the day

"I think Halladay would find a way to pitch even if his eyes were swollen shut from an allergic reaction to shellfish." -- buster olney

Labels: quote of

separated at birth?

not that jimmy needs any help.

Labels: separated at birth

A-Rod: 'I Hate Being A New York Yankee'

September 7, 2006 | Onion Sports

NEW YORK—Yankee third-baseman Alex Rodriguez, whose tenure in pinstripes has been plagued by his inability to live up to expectations set by the media, fans, and team owner George Steinbrenner, broke down yesterday after an 0-for-5 performance and tearfully announced that he hates being a New York Yankee. "It just really sucks here," said Rodriguez, who noted that the pressure he faces every day living in the city of New York and playing for the Yankees has become "fucking outrageous." "I hate all of it—the dress code, the strict curfew, not having my name on my uniform, the stadium, the tradition, my teammates, playing third base—all of it. For the love of Christ, get me the fuck out of this shithole." Rodriguez later added that the only thing he likes about being a New York Yankee is Don Mattingly.

Labels: team a-rod, yanquis

"YOU WANNA TELL ME WHERE IS TAIWAN?!"

Dugout appreciation post

:D

on that note, i been a busy girl with the camera. more bad pictures:

- t-clip, 'zilla and the thunder
- welcome to balmer, hon

oh yeah, this guy played too

The Thunder fans (5,114, far more than usual for a playoff game, but far fewer than the record-setting crowds that showed up in May 2003 when Derek Jeter rehabbed here) got their mojo going in the first inning, when Thunder starter Phil Hughes (remember Phil Hughes? The Yankees' No. 1 prospect was the big story in Trenton before Godzilla arrived) struck out three straight batters after a leadoff single.

That set the stage for the bottom of first, when, with any luck, clean-up Matsui would bat. And when second baseman Gabe Lopez got on, the fans knew that Matsui wasn't far off.

Randy Ruiz flied out (remember Randy Ruiz? He led the Eastern League in RBIs B.G. -- Before Godzilla) and the crowd noise revved up as Matsui stepped up.

Now we flash back to Portland manager Todd Claus, talking be fore the game: "Timing is the key to hitting. I bet 88 (mph) looks like 98 to him right now. Hopefully, it takes him a few games to get that down."

For a while, it looked like Claus might be right. Matsui took a strike, fouled off a pitch, and took a ball. Portland right-hander Devern Hansack wasn't about to given him anything good. He jammed him inside with a slider, and Matsui swung hard and looked bad.

Still, fans weren't too discouraged. Matsui made his big-league debut in an exhibition game against the Cincinnati Reds on Feb. 27, 2003. He grounded out in his first at-bat that day; in his second at-bat, he hit a two-run homer.

But in the fourth inning last night, in his second at-bat, Matsui drove a 2-1 pitch to right field. Portland's Brandon Moss needed only a few steps to gather it in. Still, it was solidly hit.

Matsui came up in the fifth with two men on and the game tied. Hansack threw two straight balls, and, as the boos rained down, Claus elected to intentionally walk Matsui.

It may have been a mistake. You don't want to make the monster mad. In the seventh, Matsui gave the fans what they had come for. He drove a 3-0 pitch into the gap between first and second. Gabe Lopez scored from second to give the Thunder a 3-1 lead, and that was the final score. Satisfied with what they had seen, most fans didn't even stay for the postgame fireworks. [trenton times]

Labels: baby bombers, yanquis

in the words of annie savoy: oh my

phil hughes' line against portland during game 1 of the northern division championship series:

Labels: baby bombers, pocket rocket

boys will be boys!

As if college coaches didn't have enough to worry about, they now find themselves holding their breath as they surf the Internet and discover athletes' personal diaries that would make Madonna blush.

With a few clicks of a mouse, coaches and athletic department administrators are exploring the underbelly of their student-athletes' social world, electronically snooping on things that until a few years ago remained guarded within the confines of locker rooms, dorm hallways and fraternity and sorority houses.

Much of what they're finding on social networking websites MySpace.com and Facebook.com is harmless, sophomoric collegiate jocularity. But they are also finding sexually explicit photos and recordings, an alarming amount of profanity, references to being ``crunk'' (crazy drunk), and images that could be embarrassing to their universities. The sites could also prove a particular headache for college athletes because overzealous boosters, agents, gamblers and the media have easy access.

It has become such a concern that college athletic departments across the nation are cracking down, demanding that athletes sanitize their profiles. The NCAA Student-Athlete Advisory Committee discussed at its recent meeting, and some Florida schools have already issued written warnings and policies.

The Miami Herald searched for more than 500 football players from the University of Miami, University of Florida, Florida State, Florida International and Florida Atlantic and found that more than half have personal webpages on one or both sites.

Seventy-six of 100 UM players have pages, 55 of 113 at UF, 51 of 92 at FSU, 59 of 93 at FIU, and 57 of 116 at FAU. Players interviewed said they join the free websites because it's an easy way to keep up with their friends. MySpace boasts 100 million members and the college-exclusive Facebook has 8 million users.

The sites also offer athletes a forum to trash-talk electronically with upcoming opponents. UM's Darryl Sharpton told a funny story about a Virginia Tech linebacker who last season jokingly ``poked'' several UM players - a phrase that means flirt in Facebook vernacular. ``After we won that game, we found that guy and had some fun with him.''

The football players all agreed they have to be cautious about what they post, but many of those same athletes have raunchy web profiles.

Scroll down the MySpace page of UM safety Brandon Meriweather (aka Hit-Stick 19) and you'll find dozens of provocative photos of his female ``friends'' in g-strings. There is also a series of photos of a woman stripping that ends with a shocking nude image of her with male genitalia superimposed over her crotch. Apparently, that photo made the rounds because it also shows up on the MySpace page of UF cornerback Lamont Sheppard.

FAU wide receiver Chris Bonner claims he is selective in what he posts. ``You don't want to make a bad name for your school,'' he said. And yet, he opens his MySpace profile with: ``I'm not gay, so homos stay away.'' He also includes close-up photos of women's bare buttocks, a cartoon of stick figures having oral sex, and a photo of two young men at a party with revolvers sticking out of their waistbands. [mercury news]

Labels: boys behaving badly

my grandma would probably be all "why do you bunt so goddamned much?"

Helen Beller is truly a Yankees fan for the ages.

The great-great-grandma from Manhattan's upper West Side has been rootin' for the Bronx Bombers all her life, which began in 1903, the same year the Yanks were born as the Highlanders.

Last night she saw her first game at the stadium in more than a half-century - a treat provided by her grandson.

But then Beller got an unexpected treat, thanks to Yankee General Manager Brian Cashman.

She got to meet her favorite player, Derek Jeter, and for a moment she seemed less like a 103-year-old woman and more like a starstruck young fan.

"You're so goddamned handsome," she blurted out to the All-Star shortstop, as they posed for a photo.

Jeter looked around for help, then simply replied, "Thank you."

For a second pose, Beller put her arm around the grinning Jeter and whispered, "No one deserves to be that good looking." [ daily news]

Labels: yanquis

quote of the morning

"I still haven't had official word. I read what you guys are reading. I can't really comment on it because I haven't received a call. I'm sure I'll find out eventually what's going on. I was contacted by the (Yankees) trainer, Mark Littlefield, who said he (Matsui) was coming, so I guess I have been contacted. But where he's going to hit and whether he'll play left field, I have not been told. I'm sure I'll find out." -- bill masse, on godzilla's impending arrival

Labels: quote of

maybe it'll help his HOF case?

Viewers tuning in for the opening of the Twins-Yankees telecast Sunday afternoon on WFTC got an unexpected surprise.

Analyst Bert Blyleven, apparently thinking the segment was being taped, used two profanities after a slip-up during what is known as the standup. Blyleven seemed to think the segment could be shot again and was blaming himself for making a mistake. [star tribune]

dear alex

they don't deserve curtain calls.




dear kitty

blame bill veeck.

ot: that sound you hear is me banging my head against my desk

Rapper/actor Mos Def was arrested and charged with disorderly conduct last night after he put on an unauthorized show outside New York City's Radio City Music Hall following the MTV Video Music Awards.

According to the New York Police Department, Mos Def--real name Dante Smith--pulled up outside the prestigious venue at 10 p.m. EDT in a flatbed truck and began to perform through a sound system, quickly attracting a large crowd.

The Black on Both Sides star reportedly performed “Katrina Clap,” a savage attack on President George W. Bush's administration's slow response to Hurricane Katrina last year, before NYPD officers told him and his entourage to pull the plug and began making arrests. [hollywood.com]

but this no-talent trainwreck gets rewarded for imitating hip-hop? feh.

quote of

“That was a little embarrassing. In no way, shape or form would I ever be disrespectful. But you don’t tell the umpire, ‘Time out, I have to listen to Kate.’ ” - jim leyland, on why he continued to argue (hat off!) through the 7th inning stretch

Labels: quote of