i heart yard work
12.27.2005
This is the time of year when you’re supposed to gather with friends and family and reflect on things you’re thankful for. But Rickey Henderson ain’t thankful for sh-t! There are some dudes out there signing some pretty big contracts. But are any of them named Rickey? Hell no! Is Rickey’s phone ringing? Rickey hasn’t heard it!
Here are some things that Rickey ain’t thankful for:
- Scott Boras. Man, f-ck a Scott Boras! Scott Boras goes up there and writes a big old book on Johnny Damon and says that Johnny Damon is better than Rickey Henderson? Scott Boras has some nerve. Rickey’s seen Johnny Damon. You think Rickey Henderson wouldn’t walk around with a paper bag over his face all day if he had that noodle arm and that stupid haircut? Please! Johnny Damon should be ashamed of himself. Rickey even saw one game where Johnny Damon jumped into a wall in center field because he was too stupid to just stop running. You think Johnny Damon has the lizard-like instincts that allow Rickey Henderson to stop on a dime like only Rickey Henderson, or a lizard, can? Fuck a Johnny Damon!
