worcester's own

dear tanyon sturtze,

i would like to take a moment to apologize for ever damning you to bum-hood. it was my birthday, i was disappointed. you can't really blame a girl. oh, and that time i opined that perhaps the yankee organization was confused by the fact that you superficially resemble greg maddux? i'm sorry for that, too. you're not a bum, not really. sure, maybe once in awhile you look like a doe frozen in the headlights of a mack truck out on the mound... maybe you walk in some runs, hit some batters. it happens! what's important is that you get out there and do the best you can. you know what's really funny though, tanyon? that lately i'm kinda... happy to see you trotting out from the pen, like an old friend. maybe i'm finally starting to trust you. i am old-fashioned, after all.

i'm glad i got a chance to say this to you. and i'm glad you're in the pen. slap e-lo around a little for me, will ya?

love,
your friend,
at least until the next time you fuck up,
lupe